there is no mind by the words i hear
my thoughts are multifold
multiplied
by the vapid pace
the flat space
with tic marks
making his way across my lines
of lavender and blue.

a jagged streak
like lightning rippling my vapored atmosphere
cutting through the rain
on a million sunny violets
dancing in the dark
a hidden beauty
hiding in their tears.

the sea roars beside me
power tumbling on
impetuously
perpetuating the stillness of the sand.
water seeps
into the cracks and creeps
through the spaces in my head
between the hairs, gold, brown, and red
into the tiny tree growing inside
a myriad of leaves unfolding
ever folding
green shades to my eyes
giving power from without to the tinyness within
giving strength to the weakling courage
that growls in my heart.
do i have the strength to stand?
to fight? or write?

i am humbled by this door
holding me in, dry bones
keeping me back from me
wanting to be united into one
like two lovers under the moon.
the lavender is racing through my heart
and the blue is coming out of my head
rolling down my nose
through my hair
over my toes.

i winked at my big toe and he said hello
but my baby is still sleeping
they are connected
some tendon unites us
some lifeline binds us
and i
cant
seem
to figure it out

the door is closed
until you figure it out
open it

it's the same thing.

really,
you just have to understand me
but no one does
it's just like all the years
all the fights, all the wars
and we keep on screaming peace
while we yell out in dismay
that i'm different
and it'll always be this way
'cause you're not perfect enough for me.

really,
you'd just have to understand.
but you never will.

lavender and blue, so light blue,
they're thinning out across my mind
thumbing through the pages
of the slanting script
my cursive story
from childhood to this
a forest and a little puddle
are my mirror
to see you by.
magic leads me on
and it's in my mind but
you can't see me while i'm watching you.

someday you'll find out who i am
(again but "it's new")
and then i'll fall

down in.